We'll be ok

So I have this dear friend.

But we've gone through similar heart breaks.
Just a few months apart.

Mine was in July.
Theirs was recently.

I've been helping them along with some other friends to get through this emotional stage.
Getting out of a long term relationship and trying to deal with this transition is one of the hardest things.
I ate a lot of calories.
I tend to eat my feelings which thank goodness I have a high metabolism

Probably not the most healthy of habits but at least its not cocaine.



There was this moment recently when we were out with some friends and I was the DD once again and i'm waiting for everyone to get their lives together so I can take all of them home.

And I turn to my friend who is also in this state of being done with people and I just put my head on their shoulder because i'm tired.
And then they put their head on top of mine.
And I just say, We'll be OK.
And they put their arm around me and i'm reminded that we are never alone in this life.
All whilst my friends are being spazzy in a dingy bar.
We have friends to take the place of our emotional support and love when we may not have a significant other.

I still struggle to this day with loving myself.
There definitely was many instances when I just wanted to curl up in a ball and die.
But I got back up.
I found out how to love myself.
All my quirks.
All my flaws.
All my scars.

I found how to make myself happy which I think is the most important.
You don't need anyone to make you happy.
That's when you've found true strength.


Sometimes it was too hard to keep the tears under control.
Sometimes writing wasn't enough.
Sometimes friends weren't enough to keep me from going crazy.

Sometimes my mind was moving too fast.
Thinking too many thoughts


The trick is the quiet all the worry and thoughts about that you should have gotten back together.

This person was having these thoughts this week and all I can say is to never look back.
Don't go back.
There was a reason it fell apart.

There are better people out there.

And you might hate yourself for being in a relationship that you can see now was riddled with cracks.
And how did you not see it before?

That's the worst.
You can never truly pinpoint why you stayed unhappy for so long and didn't realize it.

Sure there were plenty of good memories.
But mine like my friends instance is that the two of them just grew apart.
And if you were the one that was trying to keep it together and putting in the work it hurts more because you feel like even though you tried your hardest it wasn't enough to keep the love alive.

This friend and I are literally going through the same thing about 7 months apart.


So i'm trying to be there for them as I had hoped someone had been there for me.
I'm trying to get out all their emotions and keep their mind off how sad they really are.

Companionship.
Friendship.
Love.

Being there for someone that needs you.
That's one of the most satisfying moments.
I love being there for them.
Getting them out.
Being a friend.

That's one of the few things I can do right.