21

Well its been a month since I turned 22.

So why not write about what the hell I learned in my 21st year of life.

I didn't get to go out like I had hoped on my 21st because of the damn snow. But I did spend it with my lovely family and the best roommate ever.

And I got my mermaid tail.

I didn't get my new years kiss which looking back now was a good thing.
I set it up perfectly and then he just walked away.
Oh well.

A few weeks later I went out with my friends and properly celebrated my birthday, and very safely drank until I threw up.
I didn't make a mess.
You would be proud.

I experienced my first snow down and it was amazing and insane and slightly drunken. But I was very safe.
If you learn anything from reading this know, I am always safe whilst drinking.

I had my first date with a man on Valentines day.
And to be honest, it was pretty great.
No pressure.
Just getting to know him.

A few weeks later I ate an entire pint of talenti gelato in one sitting.

I fell in love with the most beautiful little girl on the 1st of March 2015.
Abigail Alexis Cook came into this world that particular day.

I found out that I hate being the designated driver for a ton of drunk people.
Because they always forget to thank you.
But they are awfully funny.

I met the most beautiful little girl when she was roughly 3 weeks old.

I found I like the idea of cooking and food, but I don't actually like doing it.
I want my food now.
I don't want to have to wait for it.

I found I love to snuggle with my roommate.
And that isn't weird in the least.

I went out with a friend for a few weeks.
And then we were still friends after which I am so grateful for.

I found one of my favorite professors will give the stink eye to boys that are mean

I realized in less than a year that I would be walking across that stage at graduation.
And that scared the shit out of me.

And then I told the guys in my section this fact and Andy responds "well at least then we'll be in tune..."

I saw my beautiful, wonderful and witty little sister graduate from high school. I am so proud of her.

I found out what it's like to push the limits with your parents kindness and then get mad, get stuff done and find a job.

Actually I got hired by 2 in one day.
That is quite the accomplishment.

And then I found out what its like to be let go from one because apparently I didn't quite fit.
When you seriously thought you fit in like a glove.
And having to leave this place that is like a second home. All the friends that stayed.

Also found that my dad will go out of his way if I need answers.
Lets just say, crying hot mess Julia + protective father = a great story

And then exactly 2 weeks later I got a new job. I had dropped off my resume the same day that I picked up my last pay check at my previous job. That next monday I did an interview with the new place. That day was exactly 2 weeks since I had been let go from my other job. I was so happy and fortunate to have found a new place that wanted me even with my previous experiences.

I found what its like to worry incessantly about a mentor.

I found what its like to run from one job to the next.

I found what its like to have friends that you see nearly every day.

I got to celebrate the 21st birthday of one of my best and most beautiful friends, Miss Deanna.

I went drove to Mancos on the 1 year anniversary of Bri's death and drove around and made peace with it all. I finally put her to rest.

I took up running and started racing the train sometimes.

I found I like the feeling of wind in my hair.

My wonderful family came down to see me twice. And I was the happiest camper.

I got used to living alone for 3 months.

And I jumped for joy when the roommate moved back in.
Because I really really really missed her.

I had some great kisses and some really bad ones too.
What part of kissing is a conversation, do people not understand?!
Sorry, I have strong lips. It's a bassoonist thing.

I liked this man that moved away way too long until I had to be told to move on.

We celebrated my moms' 3 year survivor day. August 8th 2012 will always be ingrained in my mind.

I was an orientation leader again this year and I bribed my group with sugar. Like capri suns, ice cream bars and some chocolate.
I think they liked me.
I see some of them occasionally.

I got on the dean's list for the first time.

I am so proud to be where I am.

I found that being single is really pretty okay.

I found that masterdating is pretty great as well. So I occasionally take myself out on a date. And it is perfectly lovely and fine with me.

Grant and I occasionally talked and I feel like things are starting to get more normal. I am so proud of him and what he is currently doing with his life.

I went on some really good dates and some really bad ones as well.

I had to be extremely blunt sometimes with people and learned that sometimes you just have to say right out that you don't like a person a certain way for them to finally get it.

I might have actually screeched for joy over the phone one night.

I became oddly good friends with my Spanish professor...

I put my foot in my mouth so badly. I still feel so awful about what I said.

I went to the cardiologist and found out some answers.
Like if I ever want to have children it is not impossible, but it would be a high-risk pregnancy.
Also, I currently have a normal functioning aorta. Yay for me and modern medicine!
And I found out that I'm a little bit of a miracle child.
So this all puts some of my future plans for what I want to do in perspective and it answers some questions instead of just beating myself up with what ifs.

I flirted a lot.

My mom came down to see my Christmas band concert and we (well mostly her) cleaned my entire apartment.
It was amazing.
Thank you so much mom.

I found kindness and understanding are things I need most.
Kindness is one of the hardest things to find in this world.

I cried a lot this year.
I questioned my self-worth a lot.

I got told my designs had become stagnant.
I hate that word.
And that me of all people could ever make anything "stagnant".
So I revamped my style.
And I think its worked.

I found that I want to find a partner. Not a husband.
I don't want to be a wife. I don't want to be boxed into what I'm expected to do.
Whatever happened to teamwork??

I found that people that are not feminists are really hard for me to get along with.
Because I feel like men and women should be equal in all facets of society.
And people that put down other people or themselves because of their gender I think is silly.

I strengthened a few relationships.
KC you have been one of the hardest people to love but at the end of the day I love that you are one of my closest friends. You push me to get out of my comfort zone and some of my favorite memories are with you. I remember the day you told me he loved you. I am so happy for you.

I also got the idea that someday I want to get a tiny bassoon tattoo somewhere on my body.

I occasionally walk around naked which never used to happen.
My body is a work of art. Why should I be ashamed of my curves or my scars?
They show my character.

I wasn't home as much as I would have liked.

We got a new puppy named Jax. Not actually a puppy, he's 4 years old. He's sweet. Just not always the smartest.

I found Claire is so much more mature than I was at her age. She amazes me every day.
I found Owen has this adorable and very secretive romantic side. Thank you, Ashley for bringing that out of him.
I found my parents are full of surprises. They are some of the most loving and caring people i've ever met. I am proud to have their blood running in my veins,

My 21st year of life was a great and hard year of life.
But I would never change it.
I am so proud of all the strides I've made.
I got out of my comfort zone a bit more.
My 21st year was a lot better than my 20th year.
I am a lot happier.
I am so much braver now.

So 22 shouldn't be too bad right??